I was young but I wasn't naive

Friends are amazing, are they not?

You can not see someone face to face for two entire years, and then you see one another and suddenly you are just as close as ever. It's curious how that works. In my relationship with Sharon, it's a God thing. Through everthing we've seen, all the far-reaching places we have been, the people who have had various levels of impact on our lives... all of it, through every piece, we are in a place where we are familiar with one another for the simple fact that the bond of Christ unites us.

We've both changed. A lot. We've grown, stretched, and parts of us have been shed like baby fat or totally abandoned like baby teeth. It's been good to see some of the awkwardness, the slight "Will she disagree with this?" parts of our lives and then to see that the other person not only accepts it but totally agrees and is on the same page. And it's good to be reminded of the healthy outlook of a life focused on Christ. I know, and have known in my heart for awhile, that I have strayed from that.

In many ways, though, this is a good thing. Some might read that last sentence in the paragraph above and say, "So you must have been wrong to leave Spokane and your church home." I disagree. It's been the best thing for me to go to a place where no one is there to tell me to stay on the right track. No one makes sure I am seeking God's face. And the healthy part of that is that I have to make that choice on my own. The Lord will never force me to do so, and I have to determine with my heart- and life- to make Him number one. And to be honest... at home- Spokane, Crossover, etc.- that choice had some level of doing what I knew others expected wrapped up in it. My motives weren't entirely wrong, but I am grateful for the reminder that though I fall six times, the Father picks me up seven. Maybe it's fall seven and He picks me up eight. But you get it.

It would be easier to be less honest. To pretend I am fine and that I am unconcerned with my current spiritual health. But that's not being real, and there is one thing I am not- fake. Even when I am messing up royally it's all out there. But one strength in my character is that I have never been afraid to say that this is me, as I am.

That all said... it's late. I am tired. Good night, world.